And then there were two…….the journey just got more complicated

I apologise for not writing a post for while I have only the same excuse I gave to my mother’s social worker for not yet competing the carer’s assessment forms….. I am too busy [caring] to complete them! That in itself could be a whole blog post on its own … and don’t even get me started on the hours of free time I need to complete DLA forms….!

Anyway, I actually have a few 5 minutes spare and felt it was the right time for a post.There is good news and bad news with this post. And for once I am going to break with tradition and go with the good news first ( I usually like to get the ‘bad stuff’ out of the way first.) My little man is coming on in leaps and bounds. He is almost one term into his new school and he is such a happy,mature, confident, cheeky little boy these days. Yes, he still occasionally enters meltdown mode but this is usually sensory related ( last one being because he didn’t want to put his feet down on the floor of the swimming pool when walking in ….until the ability to hover has been developed , he will have to make do with a carry from mum!) or perfectionism related… usually around homework time… curse those little ‘flicks’ on ‘ a’s’ that he is so determined to write just ‘ so!’ But he is on the whole anxiety free, gaining in confidence and skills & is such an amazing big brother to little M- he is always thinking of her ( so much for Aspies lacking empathy.) He has won another headteacher award for his handwriting, won a prize for world book day ( dressed up as an alien from ‘ Aliens Love Underpants), still loves his Roald Dahl, is playing Wii Mario Kart on his own, is sleeping better ( even on nights without melatonin) and is teaching himself French! His teachers say he has a lot of potential….I know – he is one in a million:)

More good news is that it is thought my arthritis is not of the rheumatoid variety. i went to see a specialist for ultra sound on my joints & the first thing he noticed was that am hypermobile and this is linked to arthritis. So, am still in quite a bit of pain some days but he is confident it can be managed with physio and some injections every now and again, so just waiting for those appointments.

So on to the bad news. That is unfair to term it that as it may offend some people or little M may read this in the future and feel she was a disappointment & she isn’t & never could be… she is my special little lady and always will be. I have posted before about my concerns about little M and her ‘ little ways.’ Well, as she grows up, her ‘ little quirks’ are becoming more apparent… her lack of eye contact more obvious, her sensory issues more pronounced, her advanced vocabulary, her need to line her Disney Princesses up, her lack of ability to sleep until her duvet cover is ‘ just right’,her upset if we try to catch a bus from a different bus stop, her pedantic language,her full blown meltdowns that kick in about an hour – 2 hours after being at nursery, her pretend play that is so convoluted & yet I realise mainly scripted from Peppa Pig and Balamory & Tinkerbell, her fascination with patterns and colours and her inability to form friendships with other children. She desperately wants to but she invades personal space, becomes repetitive or chases other kids with the rubbish they dropped on the floor and pleads with them to take it from her ( she hates rubbish on the floor and tires to pick it up wherever we go.) It is heartbreaking. The signs are so subtle in many ways and yet so similar to her big brother’s… just a different presentation with more ‘sulks’ than ‘ meltdowns’. Alarm bells are ringing a cacophony in my head. I doubt any professional will immediately see what I see and even if we make it to a golden date of assessment… the good old ADOS test was trialled on boys mainly… so can miss the subtleties that girls can show. But, I have to try. I have to get the ball rolling for someone to see my baby girl may need some help and understanding. So, we are going to the GP on Monday afternoon to see if he will refer to little man’s Paediatrician.We will see……

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N.B. the title of this blog comes from my son’s very literal understanding of ‘ magic carpet ride’ ….. he believes this to be a ‘car pit’ ( as in ‘ sand pit’) and demonstrates this with a plastic lid and toy car. The magic comes in when the toy car is covered with the lid and it disappears!

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